Songs My Friends Wrote!

by Jay Ackley

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1.
Everybody has a story they go on telling although nobody thinks it’s funny Everybody has a reason to go on living when life gets tough Everybody has an answer to all your problems when all you want is sympathy Everybody is a loser, sometimes in life when they go too far We spend our seconds waiting to up the score And fill the world up with sound-bytes and schemes But maybe instead of searching for something more We should be searching for something in between Everybody wants to wake up and know their feet are still pointing in the right direction Everybody wants a love that transcends the continuum of space and time Everybody wants a moment to stand up and hear the applause for what they are doing Everybody wants a secret that nobody knows about how great they are We spend our seconds waiting to up the score And fill the world up with sound-bytes and schemes We should be searching for something in between Sometimes when you’re on a wire you think up things you didn’t think of before And sometimes when your house is on fire you find out what you really love more Everybody feels rejected sometimes when they are the one left in the corner Everybody feels nostalgic sometimes when they hear a song they’ve sung before Everybody feels creative sometimes in the night when they walk round in circles and Everybody gets these feelings but we stick them in the cupboard and we shut the door We spend our seconds waiting to up the score And fill the world up with sound-bytes and schemes But maybe instead of searching for something more We should be searching for something We spend our whole lives waiting to up the score And fill the world up with sound-bytes and schemes But maybe instead of searching for something more We’ll find it waiting somewhere in between There’s so much there in that world outside If you keep your eyes peeled and open wide It won’t be about if you lose or win If you only remember to take it all in
2.
I don't use drugs as a crutch But sometimes I use them as a cane just a touch, never too much just enough to ease away the pain so if you see me sober you'd better say good luck because it means, i've important things to do because if it's me just passing time you know i'm gonna change my mind and hope that it strays away from you I don't drink beer, to forget but sometimes i need to clear my cloudy head just a taste, to whet my tongue and ease the tension in my neck when the day is done so if you see me sober you'd better say good luck because it means, i've important things to do because if it's me just passing time you know i'm gonna change my mind and hope that it strays away from hope that it stays away from hope that it's a ways away from you
3.
Some of my friends They don't understand Why you got nobody holding your hand I’d never set you up You take your time, that’s fine Except the graveyard shift, You got a life divine You said paramours Are a waste of expensive lingerie But to all of them You’re the one who got away Post-Punk, Post-Love That’s an efficient turn of phrase To codify your raison d’etre Post-Punk, Post-Love Making nights of all your days You’re Hecate hyphenate You keep pulling those cards Hoping they’ll come up hearts But the spread says death Comes before the lovers So don’t turn over the others With the sound compressed no more whiplash stress All the highs and lows Are just so overrated Now you’re desaturated CHORUS You may lay your body down But you won't lay your heart out on the line Some of my friends They still hang around Hopin you’ll check in The lost and found
4.
all the goth boys ever want to do is make out and all the punk boys ever want to do is fuck consensually but i wanna do all that i wanna do all that with you, with you It feels like love when it makes you sick and i'm tired of being a hypocrite let’s shoot up and sleep all day just once a year it'll be okay don't ever stop talking cuz i might cry and i don't mind so much That you’re not here cuz i can't be there x3 no i can't be there with you cuz you're in atlanta with that fake ass southern charm and i'm riding the g train with a Ballentine in my lap maybe you're in virginia And It’s not my job to care i don't mind so much that you're not here cuz i'll never be no i'll never be like you. all the goth boys ever want to do is make out and all the punk boys ever want to do is fuck consensually but i wanna do all that i wanna do all that with you and all the queer boys ever wanna do is fake it Glad you stuck around just long enough And all the queer boys ever wanna do is fake it Glad you stuck around just long enough And all the queer boys ever wanna do is fake it Glad you stuck around just long enough to see what’s inside of my
5.
She woke up in a sweat-soaked panic and it wasn't from a dream— It was a string of soft numbers, the blue and the red, burned in her head last night off the TV screen. She caught a glimpse of her face in the mirror and it wasn't who she'd been. Some deeper level of stupid, some newfound circle of hell, some wicked spell started dragging her in. What have you done? You cut the bottom rungs off of the ladder. Now no one's getting out of here alive. She took a ride on a silent subway, no one looked her in the eyes. Was like this city of color had gone gray overnight, and all the light was snuffed out by the sick surprise. She walked to work with her head on a swivel cuz she don't know who to trust. How many cordial neighbors, how many casual friends, how many men think she's lesser than them? You pinned your hands to the top of the ladder so if you go down then we'd all go down too. Well now the morning has come. We're cutting right to the heart of the matter: We'd rather burn this fucker down than be like you. Oh, well what have we done? No, no, we can't blame it all on our fathers. we can't let them think they've won we'll build their bones into rungs of the ladder, and turn it on its side and walk across.
6.
the dogs are happy, why aren't i the bees are snappy why am i the trees are growing why can't i get out of the ropes, get untied my brain's a metalhead, it likes constant screams that you can't dissect or do anything to unwinding and dining there's nothing to these nerves but i guess it's just what i deserve cuz when i was a kid i wished to be a god with powers unknown to a normal broad an interesting backstory full of trauma and grief how words can shake up an ignornat belief soon to grow up and figure out these jokes shouldn't be joked about the sadness for the old times, stepped right in cracks made by former friends flowers in the wheatgrass itch my ass early in the summer and the power dynamics oh dammit i realize my control the frogs are jumpin' so am i the bunnies are humpin' i'm gonna try i climb through the tunnel to get to the slide i push myself to the other side i'm so glad that i'm alive
7.
Death is alive in the streets In the seductive moonlight Calling for a sacrifice The city loves a suicide Doom like a harrier Charges in like a storm The racing of your blood Keeps you warm Motorcycle, there’s no God tonight Only streetlights; motorcycle Hurts like a Chinese burn The way it cuts you up The blood you shed’s a penance For the chaos you love The night keeps no secrets Assassins made of chrome The rain a deluge Leaving ghosts on the road CHORUS Courting oblivion Midnight of your life Vultures line the streets On the last ride Motor cycle
8.
i don't want to go but you don't want me here you don't come to my shows or buy me a beer you call me when you're stoned in your underwear i'll meet you at your home, you don't have to pay my cabfare pencil me in pencil me in please don't erase pencil me in pencil me in please keep a place in your mind pencil me in pencil me in pencil me in so look who's here, you come to say you're sorry haven't seen you in a year it's all hunky dory still in the same place, i still know how to get there you still remember my face why wouldn't you i'm so weird pencil me in pencil me in please don't erase pencil me in pencil me in please keep a place in your mind pencil me in pencil me in pencil me in
9.
I woke up in the corner i ran my fingers through my hair i wandered round these empty walls and then i wandered down the stairs taking 10 steps to the bus stop would a dollar buy my fare you say you're still trying to forgive me forgive me then if i don't really care i've been in trouble now for so long that i can hardly remember the other side i've been in trouble now for so long that i can hardly remember what it was like before they it's a million miles from anywhere it is a million miles from the sun oh i don't care as long as it's a million miles from the place where i'd begun is it too late now for forgiveness is it too late now for regrets is it too late now to close my eyes and ask if it's all over yet and ask if it's all over yet i've been in trouble now for so long that i can hardly remember the other side i've been in trouble now for so long that i can hardly remember what it was like before he said he's not trying to save me he said he knows how it is so you walk a mile in someone else's shoes yeah sure but please don't tell me how to live well now it's too late now for forgiveness yes it's too late now for regrets just like it's too late now to close my eyes and ask if it's all over yet i've been in trouble now for so long that i don't care about the hows or whys i've been in trouble now for so long i guess i just don't really care anymore about what it was like
10.
time scabs over all wounds as it soldiers on but it’s so, so dull to keep moving along when I never bothered to grow up big or strong so I broke my fist on a young boy’s face s-s-so, so sick of my adult angst, you know but oh no I don’t want to let it go so I’ll do you one better than happily forever said do you one better than happily forever after all this time I never learned how to say never we could bleed on out until this whole town is red is it so, so sad if that’s as good as it gets so softly said, don’t know what you expected to find round here dear sister of mine just s-s-so, so tired of being a survivor are you but oh no I don’t want to let it go so easily so I’ll do you one better than happily forever said do you one better than happily forever after all this time I never learned how to say never when it hurts to breathe, well I tell myself that if it’s not you then it’s someone else and so long as we’re here we might as well enjoy it while it lasts if it gets hard to breathe will I tell myself that if I’m not here then I’m somewhere else and so long as I’m there I might as well enjoy this while it lasts I’ll do you one better than happily forever said do you one better than happily forever after all this time I never learned how to feel pleasure
11.
She reminds me of little riding hood in red just after the big bad wolf is dead and all the huntsmen are hankering for lifelong romance and they've got a snowball in hell of a chnce she's one tough cookie of that there's no doubt she still gets in trouble but she still can get out and she veers from the path every now and again she still talks to strangers, how else you gonna make new friends make new friends and she loves her mom and her grandmother too and she knows being kind is the hardest thing to do and she likes fresh cut flowers and loves baking bread and at night she regrets that the big bad wolf is dead cuz she wants to do it again and i love her i can't help it i love her i do when she shows up to listen, or sing a song or two and she reminds me of riding hood in red way after the big bad wolf is dead way after oh the struggle to be a better human being to ve thoughtful and kind and understanding when you say sure it's okay though they just ruined your whole day and your tuesday and wednesday as well to answer 'sure' when you wanna say 'go to hell' oh the struggle to be a better human being to keep your heart open and your hands clean to know your own wrongs and rights to stand up for the good fight to remember to say thank you and i love you and pease and not to eat too much kraft macaroni and cheese (poison, too corporate for me) oh the struggle to be a better human being not to close every bar you walk into and not to live on m&ms and caffeiene to be honest and true when there's so many other things to do like guiness or shooting dope or just hanging yourself with a rope so many choices between, yeH yu know it oh the sturggle to be a better human being to keep you heart open and your nose clean to say sure it's okay when they just ruined your whole day and your tuesday and wednesday as well when you answer sure when you wanna say go to hell.

about

I took some time to learn some of my friends' songs! I love them! I think I probably misheard some lyrics and made up my own, check out the originals!

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released July 2, 2019

In Between: Katie Skare
Change My Mind: Cody Westphal
Post-Punk Post-Love: The Hell Yeah Babies
Skumfuck: Transrectifier
The Ladder: Dylan Roth
Itch My Ass: Sourdoe
Motorcycle: Lucky Witch & the Righteous Ghost
Pencil Me In: Horra
Trouble: Eliza & the Organix
Adult Angst: T0SKA
Big Bad Wolf/Tuesday & Wednesday: Debe Dalton

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Jay Ackley Brooklyn, New York

Minnesotan in Brooklyn by way of London; having a sing-song through the dystopia.

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